What Kind of Blogger Are You?

As I venture deeper into the blogger world, I find it difficult to figure out what kind of blogger I identify as. I know my header says Lifestyle, Fashion, and Beauty but it’s really hard to bunch up the stories of my life into one of those three categories.

From a PR perspective, in order to be a successful blogger, you’re going to need to have an expertise. That’s why your readers come to your website, right? To see what expert knowledge or advice you have on a particular topic. I just don’t want to lose myself in one of those three categories on my header, you know? I know that as a person, I am so much more than just narrow categories and perceptions. I’m a complex person. By subscribing to these titles, that I have given myself, I feel as though a very significant part of me is not being represented. That’s the danger of being only A Fashion Blogger.

Now this is no disrespect to the fashion blogger. Please, I wish I could be a professional/high-end fashion blogger. Who am I kidding, I could, right? Someone once told me that, we could do anything. So why can’t I be. This is just self-esteem and motivation that I need to build in myself in order to make it happen on my own.

I took this journey as a blogger not only to grow as a writer but also as a journey, and I can’t take this journey if I am squared away into three categories. Reader, don’t subscribe yourself into three categories as well. If i learned anything this year, it is that things are always denser than we like to make them out to be. Labels are comforting, but life is just so much more.

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Father’s Day Giveaway!

Welcome to my first ever blog giveaway! I’m working with a couple other bloggers and we teamed up to give you guys this awesome Father’s Day Giveaway! Entry is easy as pie, all you have to do is follow the Rafflecopter link and instructions and you are good to go! Good Luck everybody! Make Sure you enter here (a Rafflecopter giveaway)!Father's Day

Enjoy Life Drink Good Beer Print // Hand-Forged Bottle Opener Gin & Tonic Soap // Cotton Flannel Tie

Giveaway Hosts

Buttons & Birdcages // Briannah. // Alicia Tenise // Caramel and Salt // The Caro Diaries From Campus With Love // Styles I Like // Polished Perfectly // Wandering Forevermore Hodge Podge Moments // Love and Waffles // Mermade Moments // Pennies & Paper Sydney Luella // October June // Sassy Sweetheart

What the Heck is a Thigh Gap?

So I was doing my normal Facebook Morning Peruse and one of the Humans of New York pictures came up on my news feed. This isn’t the zinger because, I always tend to like or share HONY’s pictures because I love all of the stories that these people share. 

Anyway, this was the picture I saw this morning.

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Photo Cred: Humans of New York

 

Normally I don’t read comments on the little sidebar because people tend to be super ignorant when people open up and share their personal stories, which tends to enrage me. Long story short, I read a couple of the comments on this picture, and a couple of people were complaining about her thigh gap. They were saying that because, she’s got a thigh gap she is a poor role model for young girls and an inaccurate representation on how a real women’s body is.

Pause for a second.

What the heck is a thigh gap?

According to my knowledge, when you stand with your feet together, if you have a little itty bitty space in between your legs, you’ve been blessed with the thigh gap. This means that you’re supposedly little and dainty because your legs don’t rub together.

I have a lot of a couple of things wrong with this. 

1. The Thigh Gap is a Measurement on How Pretty a Woman Is

The Thigh Gap craze has been around, to my knowledge for around a year-ish, maybe more. I don’t know, the point is, this isn’t new. But people, mostly girls, covet this gap in their thighs because it means skinny legs, and I guess just skinny all together. I’ve been pretty small all my life, and I don’t even think I have this thigh gap. I mean when I sit, they touch? I’ve been dancing ever since I was like 4 years old so I’ve got, you know, legs of a dancer. So my legs are kind of built. This doesn’t make me less pretty than the girl with the thigh gap or prettier that the girl who’s thighs touch.

2. Girls Who Have The Thigh Gap, are an Inaccurate Representation of Women and Just Add to these Body Image Issues Girls Have

If people want to start a revolution to love their bodies and not put skinny people on a pedestal, that have to realize that, skinny people are people too. Just because this poor girl in the HONY picture has got space in between her legs doesn’t make her the Spawn of Satan and a terrible role model for young girls everywhere. If people want young girls to grow up and love their bodies they have to accept the fact that there are going to be skinny people in the world to. We can’t raise our pitch forks at everyone that wear a size 4 and lower. That defeats the purpose. Because the poor little girl who doesn’t have a lot of meat on her bones is going to hear people tell her she’s not beautiful because she’s skinny and now society doesn’t like skinny anymore. That’s when the cycle starts over again.

3. Healthy = Thigh Gap

Having a thigh gap does not guarantee health or happiness. I would hope that everyone is starting to move past the thigh gap craze. Next everyone will start measuring their noses or something to see how pretty we are. It’s terrible that people some places who don’t feel very good about themselves, will go and look to find something wrong with a stranger, in order to build themselves up for only a second. Thigh gap or no thigh gap, us women need to stick together. Maybe when we do that, we’ll all see each other as beautiful.

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Gillette Venus Snap VoxBox Review #InASnap

I received this product complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes. All opinions are my own.

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A couple days ago I received my first ever VoxBox from Influenster! If you see my little badge on the sidebar, you’ll see that I’m a member of the Influenster Nation. All this means is that based on my likes and interest, they send me products and I get to review whether I like it or not. Super Duper!

Anyway, I received this adorable Gillette Venus Snap with Venus Embrace. Summer may not be until the end of June, but shorts, skirts, and tank tops season is basically here. There is nothing worse than having nice and warm weather sneak up on you, and you have hairy monster legs.

The point of the Gillette Venus Snap is that it’s portable. Basically they have a little mini version of the razor in a little egg carrying case, and you can just throw it in your purse and be on with your day. Now I know how I am and how I act, and if I’m out on the town with my friends and notice three hairs on my knee, I’m not going to stop the party and whip out my egg carrying case and take care of business. But what I would use it for is going on vacations! Packing for vacations is always a hassle and last thing I need to do is grab a handful of disposable razors and throw them in my carry on, only to lose them all in the mess of packing everything else. Now my cute little egg carrying case with my Gillette Venus Snap will have this awesome razor ready for me to bust out and shave away. 

The razor itself is great. With five blades, there’s no excuse for not getting every hair. Be wary if you do plan on using this on the go and on the fly, because the little lotion strip does need a little water for you to get that nice clean ahhhh sensation after you shave. I love it to pieces and I’ll definitely be throwing it into my carryon from now on.

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Gillette Venus Snap with Venus Embrace

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Portable Carrying Case. I think it looks like a little blue egg.

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The Egg unleashed! Holding my new little baby razor! 

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Thanks Influenster !

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Open Letter To My Hair

In celebration of my One Year Natural Hair Journey, here is an Open Letter to my hair. Enjoy.

Dear Hair,

I wanted to start off by saying, I am sorry for not taking very good care of you for 18 years. That must’ve been rough, because dry hair is no joke, and breakage is a pain in the butt. I blamed you for a lot of things growing up. Meanwhile, if I just gave you some TLC it probably wouldn’t have been that bad.

I remember when I was younger and you were big and poofy. I would cringe and cry every time Mommy would wash you. Good gracious, it was like WWIII every time I saw Mommy turn the corner with that big box of combs, scrunchies, and bobbles. It was such a waste too because I would just rip it all out. More Tears.

But you were cute when you were big and poofy. I only appreciate it now because I didn’t realize what I lost until it became the only thing I wanted; my natural hair back.

I remember the first relaxer we gave you, Hair. I think it was fourth grade. Mommy said you will be easier to manage. After some flashbacks to screaming and crying and that big box of combs, scrunchies, and bobbles, I was all for it. I cried during the first relaxer treatment. Not because I was sentimental about removing all of the kinks and curls out of you, but because it hurt like heck and it felt as though my scalp lit fire. But afterwards you were all nice and silky and shiny and you can keep it straight. That was awesome. I felt like the prettiest little fourth grader ever. Everyone in class said they liked the way you looked.

Then about every two weeks we had to go back to the hair salon and get a relaxer to keep you nice and pretty.

What the heck, right?

I hated being dumped at the hair salon for hours and hours on end just to keep you all relaxed. This was supposed to make you easier to handle and instead it just became more of a hassle. So there was some resentment towards you. 

This went on for years. You got shorter and thinner. Your scalp became more sensitive and got more scars. 

It’s not that I thought straight hair was prettier, I just thought there was no going back after being this deep in creamy crack for all of these years.

But straight hair was prettier. Or at least long hair was. I craved long hair so bad. You refused to grow past my shoulders, and you were even all broken in the back. Friends would point your broken back out, so to cover it, I’d wear scarfs to hide that imperfection away. You brushing up on the cotton from the scarfs, only made your breakage worse though. A temporary solution I guess.

It’s not that I resent you, Hair. You’re a part of me, therefore,  you are me. I just don’t feel beautiful with you. There was nothing I could do with you correctly that would make me feel like a million bucks. Cut, Trim, Grow, Weave. It all became for nothing. Relaxing you needed to end.

So that’s what we did. You and I graduated high school, went off to live alone in college, and took matters into our own hands. No more relaxing hair. We were just going to grow.

You see, with a little love and a lot of moisture, I’m starting to see great things from you. You’re growing strong. You’re also super thick. No! No! Don’t take this the wrong way! That’s a wonderful thing. Thick hair means when we get old, we’ll bald slower than everyone else and that’s what we want.

Some days stink though, I won’t lie to you. You won’t cooperate, and I thought we were a team. Bad hair days come more often then good hair days, so if I throw you in a hair tie, please don’t be upset with me, soon you’ll be ready to come out and shine.

I still struggle with beauty and finding us, as a team, pretty. Together. Curly hair works for a lot of people. So does straight hair. But neither of these seem to be working for me, and I don’t have another alternative to turn to. So we need to make this work.

Some days I love you. You make me feel pretty and different and healthy again. Hopefully some days, will become more and more days.

So Hair, in short, I am sorry for all of the harassment I have put you through over these years, but I promise to make it up to you with lots of love and coconut oil. Next year, we are going to look, and feel, even better than we do now. Curls, Kinks, and all. 

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Fancy Friends Guest Post: Monica’s Fashion Show

“Social identity: a person’s sense of who he or she is based on their group membership”

That definition was part of my introductory comments at this year’s CERRU Inter-Cultural Fashion Show, “Fashioning Our Identities.” I am currently a student fellow at the Center for Ethnic, Racial, and Religious Understanding, and while we were brainstorming themes for the 2014 fashion show, we decided to go beyond just showcasing multicultural and multiethnic garments. This year we decided to take a different approach and examine the complexity of social identity through fashion, ergo the title “Fashioning Our Identities.”

Before I get to the show, a bit about the Center: we believe in a world where our differences inspire curiosity, collaboration and innovation. We run a student fellowship and ambassador program where students meet people from different backgrounds, learn how to have difficult conversations, and engage their peers in conversations about contemporary social issues. We also sponsor events that facilitate cross-cultural engagement to advance understanding. We are based in Queens, the most diverse county in the country, and part of one of the most diverse cities in the world, a locale we are rather proud of.

So what made our fashion show special? My boss, Batya, told the audience, “Usually, at a fashion show, the model is a human hanger. In this show, the models were the focal point.” She is 100% right—this was a fashion show all about the models. All of our models went through a screening process with Batya, as they were paired with a designer or stylist that helped them unpack the intricacies of their social identities. Each of our models modeled two looks: the first, an “assumed” identity, represented the societal expectations linked with their identities, and the second, the “actual” identity, represented how the models understood their personal identities. Essentially, we tried to contrast the often inaccurate and uncomfortable identities society assigns to us with the need to express our own individual identities based on the groups we are a part of. This played our remarkably well, considering the dramatic transformation some of our models underwent. For example, one of our models (and a friend of mine!), Nashwa, is an Egyptian immigrant. Her assumed look consisted of an abaya and hijab, garments traditionally worn by conservative Muslim women. Her second look, however, was a bright orange strapless dress that showed off her tattoos, one of which was a quote from the Quran.

Although I was more involved with the behind-the-scenes planning and business aspects of the show, it was only fitting that, as MC, I would go through my own social identity transformation. I announced the first half of the show wearing a galabeya, a shift dress commonly worn by women in northern Egypt. In the second half of the show, however, I wore a fitted Calvin Klein body-con dress. I told the audience that although I consider myself a professional in all my endeavors, I never forget my Egyptian heritage, which was represented in the colors of the dress, red, white, and black, the colors of the Egyptian flag. Just like the models, I worked to reconcile what expected of me and what I expect of myself.

So, I guess I turn to you guys: how does your social identity come through in fashion? How does that differ from how society sees you? And most importantly, how do you see yourself?

Monica is 20 years old and currently a sophomore at CUNY Queens College. She is majoring in English and Political Science. In addition to being a CERRU fellow, she is also a University Scholar, Hertog Scholar, and Presidential Achiever. Monica considers herself a pop culture enthusiast, New York sports fan, and an avid lover of statement necklaces. You can follow her on twitter at @motothero

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Red Carpet Rewind: Met Gala

Sorry I have been so absent friends! Finals week is in full swing, but I do have some prepared post for you guys (Hint! Hint! A guest post from one of my favorite people is underway!) Currently, I’m in the dining commons working on some final papers. I’m also stupid sick and have no voice or will to live but alas, we must push on readers, for we cannot let Finals Week get us down!

Anyway! Big night for fashion yesterday as the Met Gala commenced! I swooned over pictures all night as I watched everyone go down the Red Carpet. Here are some of my favorites from last night!

Beyonce 

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I loved The Queen’s look. I know everyone was very iffy on it, but I liked the mesh and black and little stupid thing in front of her face. Also #DarkWomenDarkLipstick is still a thing, and I love it. Every time I see Bey and Jay on the Red Carpet, it’s like seeing the greatest power couple in the universe.

Rihanna 

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With all the RiRi news that’s been floatings around, I’m happy to see her all pretty and edgy on the Red Carpet, regardless of Instagram drama.

Chrissy Teigan 

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This months Cosmo Cover girl shined for me. Her twitter is also hysterical and she’s married to John Legend. She can really do no wrong.

Janelle Monae

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She truly is, the Electric Lady. I adore her, and her style and just everything about her.

Cara Delevingne

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I heard no buzz or anything on Cara Delevingne, and I loved her outfit. If you’re going to wear pants at the Met Ball, you’ve got to be on point, and she nailed it. She’s also got the sharpest eyebrows in the universe, but you already knew that.

 

Here are some more of my favorites from last nights Met Ball! What are some of yours?

Thursday Inspirations: Who Am I?

A while back I did a final project for another class (that I honestly hated, but grew to like eventually). We examined the question, ‘Who am I?’ but we went a lot deeper in exploring this concept. We are a lot of things, I guess you can say, but trying to discover who you are as a person, is a concept that we have to grow with for the rest of our lives. For my final project, I made a video and asked all of my friends to answer the ‘Who Am I?’ question and then tape themselves. I absolutely loved the responses I got.

I’m including this in my inspirations post because, this video I made has become very special to me. My friends are a huge source of my strength and they inspire me everyday whether they know it or not. Watch the video and think about all the awesome things you are. Then try to answer the question. Who Am I?

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April Showers Bring May Flowers: Outfit of the Day

I know my title is slightly misleading, because it isn’t actually May yet, but bare with me. I said May flowers because of my new floral dress! My new fun and floral dress that I got at Urban Outfitters is so fun and exactly what I was looking for. I also love saving money (who doesn’t?) and I got the dress for only $10.00! I love florals patterns, which is why I’m so happy it’s spring because now it’s acceptably to wear them all the time. I paired my new black floral dress with my combat boots to give the outfit some edge (it was also a little chilly out) and threw my hair in a side bun. I can’t wait to enjoy all of this nice weather!

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The Bucket List

Ever since I spontaneously Carped-some-Diem with The Buried Life, I’ve been thinking about what would be on my own bucket list. It’s weird because, I don’t want to bungee jump or anything like that, but one of the things that The Buried Life talked about was, making sure you write down what you want to accomplish, so that it’s not a dream anymore, it’s a goal. So I wanted to make my own. 

Now this might be the only time I ever post about my Bucket List. It’s also quite tentative too because granted, things change. I could add things or take things off, but now that I finally started a Bucket List and I see my goals all laid out in front of me, maybe I’ll get started on some items on my list.  What’s something on your Bucket List? 

1. Get Published

2. Work in NYC

3. Live in LA for a short amount of time

4. Become an expert at Nail Art

5. Have a well known brand

6. Have David Tutera plan my wedding

7. Meet Tia and Tamara 

8. Graduate College

9. Get a Master’s Degree 

10. Travel 

11. Be a Make Up Guru/Fashionista Extravagant 

12. Start a Family

13. Raise awesome kids

14. Have a Beach House

15. Work closely with a charity of my choice

16. Win Family Feud (the video game..)

17. Win Family Feud (the TV Show)

18. Only compete on Family Feud if Steve Harvey is the Host

19. Work in a Fashion Public Relations Firm

20. Work in Crisis Communications 

21. Swim with Dolphins

22. Go To New Zealand 

23. Meet Tyra Banks 

24. Compete on America’s Next Top Model

25. Learn the ins’ and outs’ of photography and video making

26. Become fluent in another language 

27. PET A GIRAFFE 

28. Go on a cruise 

29. Go on a Road Trip with my friends

30.  Go on a Date with Bruno Mars

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